Fallehuckinglujah is my comment on the power of words; it's a bastardization of Hallef***inglujah, which I am wont to say in moments of joy but cannot because of the f*** part. If, however, I switch the f and the h it retains the same feeling but is no longer obscene. Same feeling, same letters, only two letters switched but one is verboten and the other is, well, not

Tock tick

27 June 2017 by admin

A man is in a horrific accident and lies dying. He pleads to his friend, “Get my watch.” 

“Your watch?” 

“Yeah, I had it on me.” 

“Must be at the police station.” 

Intently, “get it!” 


“Because I’m dying!” 

“What does your watch have to do with it? Shouldn’t I get a doctor?” 

After a long pause, soul searching: “I’m from the future.” 

Laughs, “right.” 

“I need to get to my own time. Doctors there can fix what’s wrong.” 

He goes to the police station. 

“I need my friend’s watch.” 

“And who are you?” 

“His friend.” 

“We don’t give out belongings except to the belonger.” 

They argue, escalates. 

Shouting, “He’s from the future and has to go back to the future so they can save him!” 

Laughter. He leaves, sans watch. 

He returns to find his friend has died.


Collage of calling funeral homes, searching for relatives – there are none. Burial, eulogy  – he did have friends. 

The police release his belongings, including the watch. 

Excitedly, he puts it on. It looks just like an Apple Watch. Nothing happens. 

Montage of looking at the watch, playing with it, frustrated by it. 

A man appears one day, saying he’s the deceased’s cousin and needs his stuff. 

“How come I couldn’t find you?” 

“I was on vacation. Listen, can I just get his stuff?” 

“I don’t have any of it.” 

Smiling, points at his wrist. “Yes, you do. Right there.” 

“This?” Hiding it. 

“We’re not allowed to maim anyone but…”

“Maim?” Terrified. 

“Just give me the watch.” 

“But it’s just a watch.” 

Smiling, pulling out a credit card that’s transparent, with a display showing a throbbing circle that gets bigger the closer it gets to the watch. 

“What’s that?” Pointing at the card. 

“Never mind. The watch, please?”

“Only if you tell me what it does.” 

Laughs, “think I’m stupid?” 

“Well, then, who was he?” 

Uncomfortable, “a time tourist.” 

“A what?” 

“Someone who goes back and forth in time for entertainment. Not for research; those guys are assholes.” 


“Yeah, always bringing shit back with them. Leave it there!”   

Still dismayed. “How many are there?” 

“Tourists or assholes?” 

“How many people going from time to time?” 

“Millions. We honestly don’t know.” 

Surprised. “Don’t know?” 

“Hey, I’m from 2165. The tech just got better. There’s always somebody from after you, you know.” 

“From after you?” 

“After you in time, from the future.” 

“How can you tell them apart?” 

Gestures with the card.  “Tools.” 

“Do you change things?” 

“Oh, yeah, lots of shit. The Cold War was a piece of work.” 


“They had to send people all the time, stopping shit. We’re talking thermonuclear war. Fucking up the future.” Shakes his head. “The whole thing almost went up lots of times.” 

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